A Brush With the Law

For Halloween, my roommate Alissa, my friend Nicole and I carved some pumpkins. After we lit them and admired them for about ten seconds it was time to smash them. We could not think of a better place to do this than at the track in the exact spot where Nicole broke her leg. It would be a way of saying "take that, universe!"

So we got our disguises on. I dressed as a man and Nicole and Alissa put on footy pajamas with scarves and hats. We also brought light sabers and a water gun to destroy anyone who got in our way. We got in the car, shades on, and rocked out to "I'm sexy and I know it" as we made our way to ground zero.

Upon arrival at our destination, Nicole suggested that we wait for a few minutes to make sure we were in the clear. I thought this was an unnecessary precaution and was anxious to get out but I was really glad she said this because about thirty seconds later a car entered the track parking lot. We new it had to be the cops.

Then came the realization of how shady we looked driving into the track with no lights on, wearing disguises, pumpkins in hand. Our intentions could not have been more obvious. The cop turned his lights on and we knew we were caught. While we waited for him to approach our car, we quickly took off as much of our disguises as possible and I attempted to hide two pumpkins under my feet. Nicole hid the last pumpkin as the cop reached the window.

He asked what were we doing at the track. We are on the track team and came to hang out. Who are the coaches? I rattled off a bunch of their names. Why are you guys hanging out at the track so late? We came here to look at the spot where Nicole broke her leg. Have you had anything to drink? No. All of the things we said were true if you replaced hang out with smash pumpkins and look at with defile. He bought it and let us go. As we left the parking lot, another cop pulled in. We barely escaped.

Though we were fairly relieved at this point, we still had a major problem. The pumpkins remained unsmashed. It was decided that the next best place to smash them would be our teammates house. So, Megan, Kelsey, Katherin, Betsy, and Julia, you didn't know this until now, but that carnage you found in your front yard on the morning of November 1st... that was us. HAHAHA.

PS. It was a love crime. Not a hate crime.